SD-V

You know , sometimes I feel like such a fool.I give people so much importance in my life when I mean nothing to these very people.I don’t know why I do it again and again.Somewhere inside I feel so grateful for all that someone has done for me , knowingly or unknowingly , that I give them , maybe too much importance.What they mean to me is so much greater than what I probably mean to them , that it sometimes hurts.I don’t know , sometimes I guess I lose myself , my sense of self .I don’t know , sometimes , something happens and my life spins around completely and I discover myself just stopped in my tracks , adoring , maybe even worshipping someone who doesn’t really have time for me anymore.For them its just a moment , when they feel the connection .For me that moment last an eternity , Adi.It becomes a governing factor for my life.Until , of course , I discover my importance in their life and realize my mistake , again.I keep doing it again and again .Its so frustrating , it’s a habit now.I value certain person’s presence in my life so much that I lose sight of myself for a while.And my presence in that person’s life , lol , doesn’t really make that big a difference.That hurts and hurts badly.I guess , lol , I am the idiot ,what else can I say?Why do I keep making the same mistakes over and over again?Why do I let people walk over me like that?Will I ever find someone , just one person , who values my presence in his/her life as much as I value his/her presence in my life?I don’t know .I really don’t know.What I do know is that I’ll keep making this mistake over and over again.I’ll keep telling people how much they mean to me and how their presence in my life has changed the way I am or simply how much they enrich my life .I as brought up that way and I believe that if someone matters to you , you should just tell them so and make them feel it.So no matter how much time I get hurt or feel stupid I’ll keep thanking everyone , who touches my life in one way or the other , in whatever ways I can.Thanks for reading